Our walk with Jesus is something glorious. In fact, it’s the most beautiful relationship we can ever encounter. Saying yes to Jesus means saying yes to a lifetime of love, joy, faith and peacefulness: a lifetime that lasts an eternity. By knowing Him, it’s impossible to be unchanged which I find myself experiencing everyday 4 years later. What I’ve also found out is that by coming Home, we become warriors. Soldiers. We are literally fighting the evil one daily for our faith. The road to eternity was never promised to be easy, but it was promised to be abundant. It seems a bit strange, maybe a bit exaggerated, but friends I tell you that it’s wholeheartedly the truth. The things we wrestle with, our temptations, and our daily failures are all part of being human. They’re part of a realization God wants us to find which is our dependence on Him and that to follow Jesus, we begin a battle that tells Satan that the war is already won.
Four short years ago, in 8th grade (literally can’t even. That long ago already???) I came to Christ. The years leading up to my salvation were filled with brokenness and suffering. In 6th/7th grade my parents were in the process of a divorce and things at home were shaken, they were broken and all I knew is that we weren’t a family anymore. All my friends parents were together and I couldn’t understand why of all people, here I sat at home with parents who couldn’t stand to be in the same building as one another. School was a challenge all it’s own. I was horrendously immature. Like so bad, everyone at bush probably remembers so if you’re reading this and recall my dark times, I am so deeply sorry, HA! No, but really I had no friends because of the way I acted and felt isolated out of my own actions. What can I say I guess? Natural consequences? Quickly I resorted to self harming thinking that I deserved it. That I wasn’t worthy. Satan told me I was ugly, fat, stupid, hopeless, worthless, disgusting, and that between my home life and school life it would destroy me and that I’d never amount to anything. In reality, God was protecting me, because while in my sin of self harm, it was consolation to the fact that though I wanted to, I was too afraid to take my own life. Something inside me kept me from having the willpower and I owe it all to God. He saved me. He had a plan for me and continues to have a plan for me. I know what He says about me and that I am His beloved, treasured by Him far more than anything else in this world. And friends, I’m not the only one. By society’s standards, I was the kid who easily should’ve been the one to seek attention from the wrong sources and I should’ve been the one who turned to drugs, alcohol, even sex but I was too scared for any of it (still am!). But don’t you see, this isn’t meant to be a story of pity, or a story of how bad my life was. This is a story of redemption and how God has transformed my life and guess what? He’s transforming yours too, wherever your walk with Him is.
Fast forward to 8th grade. One year later, I’m not self harming anymore, and I found a group of friends. Granted they weren’t the greatest influence, but still I had people around me that helped me through things and to sum up that year thanks be to God, I was saved. Since then it’s been a constant fight to preserve my faith. And it’s been a battle that I’ve been blessed to wage. Though the road has been laden with suffering, Christ has shared in that suffering with us.
You see, now that Satan sees that we have come to Jesus, he hates us more than ever before. His whole intent leading up to our salvation was to keep it from happening and his whole intent after is to distract us from it. He comes at what he feels are the most opportune times. He knows what pushes our buttons and what causes us to squirm. However, the beauty of our freedom gives us the option to catch onto his ploys and turn from them, making the enemy squirm. To turn the tables on him. We have the power because our Papa Bear is standing right behind us to send Satan running, we just have to catch onto his schemes before they gain a foothold.
With our God having our backs eternally, we can sometimes stray when times are easier thinking that we can just lay back and take matters into our own hands now that the load has been lightened. Little do we realize that the load will never be light enough to bear without Christ because just when we least expect it, the enemy will attack and we’ll be right back down to square one. Even in the vulnerability of the moment when we’re falling asleep is when we’re most susceptible. We all have a choice as in with all situations. Are we going to let our minds be filled with the peace of the Holy Spirit or the draining negativity of the enemy? By clinging to Jesus every moment of every day, and saturating ourselves with His constant presence we no longer see the enemy’s attacks on a plane of overwhelmingness over our heads, but instead from God’s view which is that Satan is dirt beneath our feet; clothing ourselves with a cloak of righteousness that we’ve been born into.
Brothers and sisters we are not fighting for our salvation, nor are we fighting for our Daddy to love us more. He loves us so much that we’re worth more than anything else in the history of the world. He died for us and paid with something worth far more than silver and gold so it’s already finished and it is won, so our battle is to keep sight of that in the brokenness of this world and to throw the enemy back where he belongs.